


The Mistletoe Mission

by some_good_clean_fun



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Girlfriends/No Wives, Bets & Wagers, Bisexual Male Character, Christmas, Drew POV, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Mistletoe, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:06:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28252116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/some_good_clean_fun/pseuds/some_good_clean_fun
Summary: When Drew made a joke he didn't mean, it didn't occur to him he'd be paying for it the entire Christmas holiday.“I'm gonna kiss more people over the holiday season. I'm not talking sweet little pecks. I mean kisses with passion, with pizzazz. I'm gonna make everyone swoon.”“When you say more people…”“Yeah, Drew. More than you. I challenge you to a duel. Mistletoe kisses. Whoever has the most is the winner. And crowned the sexiest. And gets given $500 by the loser.”
Relationships: Danny Gonzalez/Drew Gooden, Danny Gonzalez/Others, Drew Gooden/Others
Comments: 12
Kudos: 32





	The Mistletoe Mission

**Author's Note:**

> Sometimes you want to write ridiculous Christmas fluff, but catch feelings along the way.

Drew didn’t know how he’d ended up here, in a place where Christmas-time was actually cold and the term ‘White Christmas’ was about the weather and not the KKK’s collective wet dream. But here he was and he strangely didn’t regret it. Drew liked Christmas. Sure, he knew that at the heart of it, it was a corporate capitalistic nightmare that made the rich richer and the poor poorer, but the lights were pretty. He liked the tradition of it, the joyousness that could be found, and sue him, he liked the childish wonder. Christmas meant family. It meant giving. It meant choosing to be a better version of yourself. Or at least, it _should_. 

Drew was wrapped up in about seven layers, because he was a well-prepared little icicle boy, as he sat listening to his mom listing off her top seven sight-seeing destinations. He interjected small noises as necessary. Danny’s mom had offered to show her round Chicago and privately Drew pitied them both. They’d gotten along in small doses, but Drew wasn’t sure how that would go when journeying together. Danny’s sister was sitting across the room from Drew, gazing at him disconcertingly. She either hated his guts or had a huge crush on him and he honestly didn’t know which prospect was worse. Drew was about to say something when the front door opened and Danny arrived, beanie flattening his hair against his forehead, cheeks and nose pink from the cold, and a couple of snowflakes clinging to his lashes. 

“Sorry I’m late. Traffic,” Danny called out for anyone and everyone to hear.

“You’re always late,” his sister chirped.

“Am not. I’m always about an hour too early for business meetings, appointments and seminars. It’s just with you guys that I dare to cut things close.”

Danny leaned in and pressed what must be a chilled hand to the back of her neck, which made her jump and swear, but then kissed her cheek with a devilish smile.

Drew felt he should be used to it by now, the energy that Danny brought to a room, the way he effortlessly stole attention and focus, but he wasn’t. It always felt brand new, seeing Danny again, even though he’d seen him three hours before, when Danny picked them up from the airport. 

“Did you manage to get it?” Danny’s mom asked, semi-surreptitiously. 

Drew was aware there was an ‘it’ that Danny had been tasked to procure, but didn’t know what ‘it’ was. 

“Indeed,” Danny said, giving a jaunty little head wobble. 

“All right, we’re heading out. You all keep an eye on the cookies. They need another seven minutes precisely. Let them cool before you decorate,” Danny’s mom ordered. 

She helped up Drew’s mom and they took off in Danny’s car. Apparently, it was a whole thing about automatics and stick shifts and fuel economy as to why they wanted Danny’s car rather than the family’s, but Drew hadn’t been paying attention. 

Danny finally turned toward Drew, unwrapping his scarf and pulling off his beanie. He ran a hand through his hair so his curls would spring back up. “Hey, you doing okay?” he asked.

“He’s been sitting there quiet as a mouse.”

“Please tell me you haven’t been doing your patented intimidation trick.”

“Only a little.”

“I’m fine,” Drew said. “I know not to interrupt my mom, is all.” He narrowed his eyes at Danny’s sister, and when Danny wasn’t looking, stuck his tongue out at her. She grinned back.

“Help me check out these cookies?” Danny ordered, pretending to phrase it like a question for the sake of politeness’ sake. 

“I’d be more than happy to do some quality control.”

The kitchen was warm. Danny took off his coat and tossed it onto the back of a dining chair. Drew finally felt like he could remove his too. He stood, awaiting orders, shifting his body weight from foot to foot. 

“Sorry if she was being annoying. She does it to all my friends.”

“Not annoyed. I know how sisters are,” Drew said. 

Danny bent down by the oven, squinted as he looked in at the contents. “Yeah, definitely need a couple more minutes.” He stood and leaned against one of the kitchen counters. “You ready for the party tonight?”

“How do you mean?”

“Like mentally fortified. There’s going to be over sixty people and you know like ten of them.”

“Danny, I’m not a complete shut-in. I can handle company. I can even be witty and charming, when the need arises.”

“Oh, so you’re going to act. Yeah, solid plan.”

“Uh, fuck you.”

Danny grinned. “Sorry, it’s just, you really did look a little lost in there.” Danny nodded toward the living room. 

“That’s because your sister was looking at me like she wanted to devour me, my mom was talking a mile a minute and your mom kept checking her watch like she was worried you’d ended up in Siberia. I don’t do well in unfamiliar situations, but I’ve been to enough parties to know how to handle myself.”

“My bad. As long as you’re sure. We could always escape halfway through the night. Go back to my place.”

“See, now you’ve given the anxiety-voice in the back of my brain that suggestion, and that’s just cruel.”

*

The party was incredible. Danny’s mom was an amazing baker and his dad was a great cook. The decorations that Drew had helped place made the inside and outside of the house look festive and bright. Solar lights were strung up outside and they had battery packs so they still worked even though Drew hadn’t seen the sun the entire time he’d been there. Faint music was playing inside; a mix of old-school and contemporary Christmas songs and carols. 

Drew’s mom appeared to be having a wonderful time and he was grateful, because she deserved a good Christmas. While 2021 hadn’t been as nightmarish as 2020 had been, it had still been tough. A lot of Danny’s childhood friends had adopted Drew as one of their own and he was able to join and start many conversations. Plus, Danny was never too far away. Even though he’d never admit it out loud, Drew was happy about that.

Danny’s song ‘I’m Gonna Kill Santa Claus’ came on and there was a cheer from the group Drew was standing with. Danny was across the circle, moving in time with the music, his hands above his head, swaying from side to side.

“What are you gonna do this year?” Laura asked when the song finished. “You said you had another holiday track planned?”

“I’m gonna be a sexy lil elf on the shelf,” Danny said. “A ho ho ho for Christmas if you will. Blow all the Gregs’ minds wild.”

Drew imagined it. He hoped the lighting outside was too dim to see the blush that was surely creeping up his cheeks. 

“Well, that’s not gonna work,” Drew said. 

Danny stared at him. “Huh?”

“You being sexy? You’re so clean cut. There's absolutely nothing sexy about you.”

“Hey, fuck you to the moon and back.”

“No, you wouldn't. That’s my point.”

“People find me sexy!” Danny exclaimed. He turned to Laura. “You think I’m sexy, right?”

“Under the right conditions, maybe,” Laura replied, shrugging a shoulder. “Like when you style your hair a certain way. Dress right.”

“That’s not…” Danny started. “Tim, I’m sexy, aren’t I?”

“You’re like a brother to me so I don’t feel qualified to judge.”

“Looks like the crowd has spoken,” Drew said. “You have the sex appeal of a gingerbread boy.”

Danny was wide-mouthed now, indignant. “I'm gonna prove to you that I have sex appeal.”

Drew crossed his arms. “Yeah? How?”

Danny thought for a moment, settled back on his heels.

“I'm gonna kiss more people over the holiday season. I'm not talking sweet little pecks. I mean kisses with passion, with pizzazz. I'm gonna make everyone swoon.”

“When you say more people…”

“Yeah, Drew. More than you. I challenge you to a duel. Mistletoe kisses. Whoever has the most is the winner. And crowned the sexiest. And gets given $500 by the loser.”

“Uhh, guys, are you sure you want to start this –”

“Shut up, Tim,” Danny interrupted, holding a hand out toward his friend in a classic ‘talk to the hand’ gesture. Tim flicked his palm three times in quick succession.

“I think it’s an excellent idea,” Drew said, like a moron.

“There should be rules,” Laura said. 

“Of course,” someone muttered.

“You need verbal consent before a kiss,” Danny said.

“ _They_ need to kiss you, not the other way around,” Drew added.

“You need all the kisses complete before Midnight Christmas Eve,” Tim said, seemingly giving up on talking them into sense. “With photographic proof.”

“Ten days. Easy,” Danny said, full of cocksure bravado and confidence.

Drew wished he felt the same way.

The party went on for another few hours. Drew ended up chatting with friends of Danny’s brother Matt about the new spate of games coming out for the PS5. Danny went off to dance with some of his friends, only coming to talk to Drew to offer him some hot buttered rum. It was a fun night and Drew enjoyed himself immensely, but if he allowed himself, he realized he’d summoned a great big storm cloud to hang over his head.

*

He didn’t know why he’d said it. That Danny wasn’t sexy. He thought about it that night, staying in Danny’s guest room across from his snoring mom. It was the opposite of true for Drew, and he knew Danny’s friends had only joined him for the bit because it held the most comedic potential.

It was something Danny was usually good with inviting; laughter at his expense. He had a track record of getting people to joke about him, Drew thought maybe to keep him humble. But had he really been hurt by what Drew had said? He’d looked at Drew later that night with an unreadable stare. And maybe it was because Danny’s face when he was thinking was half murderous, half forlorn, but Drew had felt distinctly unsettled by the expression.

He decided there was no point wondering about it. He’d talk to Danny in the morning, call the whole thing off.

*

Danny was stringing up garlands of mistletoe when Drew finally stumbled downstairs. 

“He has arisen!” Danny intoned, climbing down the ladder and nudging into Drew’s shoulder. He gave Drew a ready smile and Drew breathed a sigh of relief. He then smiled back, gestured to the added decorations.

“Festive.”

“Fortunate,” Danny replied. “Just in time for my shindig tonight.”

“I thought that was Monday?”

“I moved it up a few days. I’ve invited some other Chicago improvvers on Monday.”

“Danny, we don’t have to –”

“You’re not backing out now, are you? Scared of a little competition?”

“I’m not scared. I’m just saying, it was a throwaway line.”

Danny quirked an eyebrow, smirked. He looked altogether too pleased with himself. His eyes were bright, his head tilted, and Drew just couldn’t handle it. “So I am sexy.”

Drew winced. “No, I wouldn’t say _that_.”

Danny turned around, gathering up his supplies and putting them in a box. “The bet’s still on.”

*

This party was much more raucous, given that none of the older adults were involved. Drew’s mom had gone to play board games with Danny’s parents, and was going to stay the night at their house instead. She and Danny’s mom actually got along really well, and Drew was a little worried they were conspiring against their sons in some way, but he wouldn’t voice those worries aloud. 

Drew had had a few drinks and smoked half a joint. He was chatting with one of Danny’s high school Speech friends, Teri or Cheri, he hadn’t quite heard her name. He told her about his competition with Danny, more for something to say than anything else. She slid her hand up his arm, cupped his neck, smiling wickedly.

“Wanna make out in the archway?”

“Yes, yeah, absolutely,” Drew said, standing up and taking her hand. “I told you about the photo part didn’t I?”

“Hmm mmm,” Teri or Cheri or Sherri murmured.

Drew passed his phone to Tim. “Witness this, please,” he said, standing with the pretty redhead under the archway of mistletoe.

She kissed him like a drunk frat boy, her tongue going too deep into his mouth too quickly and her hands sliding up his back. She nipped at his lower lip with too much bite and kept sloppily trying to press deeper entry. Drew dipped her back in order to wrestle some control, and turned the kisses gentler, sweeter. He pulled them back up and finished the kiss, gazing into her dazed eyes. 

“Wow,” she said, patting his shoulder. “Do all the kisses have to be with different people?”

“Yeah. They do,” Danny’s voice said. He was standing next to Tim, his jaw clenched and his eyes colder than usual. “One point to you, Drew,” he said, with a mock bow.

Drew’s stomach felt twisted in knots. His heart thumped hard within his rib cage. Was Danny really angry or just playing a bit?

“Can you help me get another drink?” the girl still clinging onto Drew’s arm asked. 

“Of course,” Drew said, because he was nothing if not a gentleman.

An hour or so later, Drew was mingling with a new group of people, Kelli, it turned out her name was Kelli, making eyes at him across the circle when he heard a chorus of whistles and whoops. He turned around to see Danny in the living room doorway kissing a modelesque-looking guy with dark brown hair and a light scruff. Danny had one hand raking into the hair at the back of the guy’s head, and the other holding his phone to take the picture of them. When they pulled apart, Danny ducked in for another kiss and then whispered something that looked like a thanks.

Drew’s lungs hurt. His stomach felt like it had fire ants crawling inside it. And he took another large gulp of whatever drink he had in his hand to try and squelch the feelings. 

When Danny cast his gaze around, and found Drew, Drew tipped his glass to him in congratulations. He thought his face was smiling. He couldn’t be sure.

Danny winked and mouthed, “One each.”

*  
Drew had a pounding headache and upset stomach, but he was helping decorate a gingerbread house anyway because Laura’s nephews were involved and Drew liked kids. Kids were great. They were in-congruently morbid – one of Laura’s nephews had purposely broken off a gingerbread man’s legs and was decorating them with stitches, they were enthusiastic about everything, and you could trick them by saying it was possible to grow candy canes, which is what Danny was doing right that second with one of the kids.

Laura and her sister were supervising, trying to ensure the candy went on the house and not in the kids’ mouths, but some of it definitely did both. Drew was piping shingles on the roof with thick white frosting, trying to make it look like the aftermath of a snowstorm. He added gumdrops to the very top, to cover up his mistakes and make it look colorful. 

“So the tic tacs attract sugar crystals out of the cocoa?” 

“Yeah, like magnets. Then the crystals form together in a helix and that’s how you get the pink and white stripes.”

“What’s a helix?”

“A spiral. Like on a candy cane.” 

“Cool!”

Drew couldn’t help himself but look over at that, smiling. Danny sounded so convincing, and he was pretty sure a five year old had no defense against a persuasive person like Danny sounding so authoritative. 

Danny glanced back at him, his smile small and muted. Maybe he didn’t want to let on that he was amused, afraid it would reveal the ruse. 

Drew began helping add more candy on top of the frosting, lining where the walls joined and using colored frosting to add curlicues and stars to parts of the walls that had cracks. He listened to the advice given to him by one of the kids, Robbie, who was using red and green sour tape to make a pathway, by flinging sprinkles against the frosting and hoping they’d stick.

“Can you help me make a wreath?” Robbie asked.

“Sure. What do you want me to do?” Drew asked back.

“Cut this green tape into small rectangles so I can overlap them into a circle?”

“Ohhh, good thinking. I’m on it.”

By the time the decoration was finished, the gingerbread house was looking good. Not professional bakery level, but conscientious homemade style, with enough mistakes to make it charming but not so many it was structurally unsound. Drew stepped back and admired his handiwork. Danny moved into the space he’d occupied and started adjusting the skittles candies along the top of the chimney, swapping some out for others. 

“What’re you doing?”

“Making it a pattern instead of a random assortment. I would’ve thought it was obvious.”

Drew looked closer, saw the color pattern emerge. 

“We don’t all see the world as mathematical equations to be solved,” Drew ribbed.

Danny sounded entirely serious when he said, “Maybe you should.”

Tyler came and pulled Danny’s elbow. “Can we grow candy canes today?”

“It takes a lot of patience,” Danny said, spinning around and heading back toward where Tyler was dissecting a gummi worm; Drew hoped to use as decoration for his gingerbread man, but he couldn’t be sure. “Also, you need all of the materials assembled before you start. I have the pink, strawberry tic tacs, but I don’t have any white ones.”

“I do. I could go get them, if you want?” Drew offered.

“Okay,” Danny said, seeming surprised. “If you don’t mind?”

Drew sped to his room, acquired the box, and came back to assist Danny and the kids as they poured dry cocoa into mugs, placed in the tic tacs and covered them up. Cocoa in the hands of a five and eight year old went everywhere, even though they were trying to be careful, and Drew sneezed at least four times as he tried to tidy the excess up. Danny smiled at him again, small and sweet, and Drew grinned helplessly back. 

“Right, now we just leave them here and we’ll see results in the next few days.”

“It has to stay here?” Tyler asked, pouting.

“Yep, sorry little buddy. If you disturb the process once it’s started, nothing will grow. I’ll take a picture of these bad boys for you tomorrow,” Danny said to the boys. He looked up at their mom. “And if you have time, you can come check them out in person in a few days’ time?”

“That’d be great, Danny, thanks. We should start packing everything away so we can take it home. Tyler, can you be my big strong helper and take the box of gingerbread men? Robbie, can you help me with the house?”

Drew helped Robbie take one side of the cake board base as his mom took the other.

“We don’t get to keep any?” Drew lamented, whining jokingly, but also not. The kids laughed at him. 

“There’s some dough left in the fridge,” Laura said. 

When they were gone, Danny set about packaging up all the candy and cleaning the work area. Drew helped him, a little disappointed that they were apparently not going to create their own gingerbread confections. 

“Did you have a good time last night?” Drew asked. He hadn’t really gotten to talk to Danny before Laura and her family had arrived because he’d woken up late.

“Yeah. I feel like everyone enjoyed themselves and that’s like my number one metric for if I had a good party. How about you?”

“Yeah, it was awesome. I liked how it was mellow and less Christmas-themed than your parents’ party. Plus, I got to hear a whole bunch of anecdotes about you in High School, so that was especially fun.”

Danny gazed at him, skeptically. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, Kelli was a virtual fount of knowledge.”

Danny’s eye flickered at that and he shrugged a shoulder. “I’m sure she was.”

“Were you two like mortal enemies? Rivals? Exes?” Drew asked, confused by Danny’s reaction.

“No. We got along okay. Why? Did she talk smack about me? Is she trying to start beef?”

“No, just…” Drew looked at how Danny’s posture had become closed off, his whole body tilted away. “Never mind.”

“I, uhh. I think I’m gonna go have a nap. You need anything?”

“No, I should be fine.”

“All right, see you when we go to my parents’ for dinner.”

Drew watched Danny go and then headed to the guest room to retrieve his phone and then decided he may as well stay there. He was out of sorts, mixed up, and generally bamboozled by Danny’s behavior. Maybe Danny was just tired and hung over. Or maybe he was angry with Drew, but Drew couldn’t figure out why. Drew settled on the bed and went through his socials, noticing that Danny appeared to be liking tweets. So much for a nap.

Usually, he and Danny got along with minimal awkward moments. They agreed on most things and even if they didn’t they could organize a workaround. This version of Danny felt like a completely unknown quantity. Drew squeezed his eyes shut and tried to think about literally anything else, but Danny looking at him with a cold, blank stare was the only thought that would manifest.

*

Danny was still kind of weird during dinner, but Drew managed to start a conversation about stand-up comedy that he ended up contributing to. It felt like a win in a day of failures, and Drew was happy for that one victory.

*

That night it snowed heavily. Drew awoke to pristine white blankets covering Danny’s yard, plants and nearby houses. It twinkled like sunlight on the ocean, small stars that glittered and dimmed in mesmerizing fashion. Drew gazed out the window for twenty minutes, maybe more, before making it downstairs, and even then sat in the kitchen gazing out onto the icy landscape.

“It’s called snow,” Danny said. “It happens in colder climes.”

“It’s beautiful,” Drew said, choosing not to engage in verbal fisticuffs. “You know I’ve never built a snowman? Had a snowball fight? I genuinely used to think they were made for tv.”

“You wanna?” Danny asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes, please,” Drew said, not even bothering to try to appear unaffected. 

Danny advised Drew put on another layer and he let him borrow a pair of gloves. Drew gazed at Danny as he wound a scarf around his neck, all too aware of how closely they were standing. 

“You’re gonna need it,” Danny said, seemingly mistaking Drew’s attention for skepticism.

“Thanks,” Drew said. 

“You won’t be saying that with a face full of snow, babyyy.”

“I’ll try, but it’ll come out muffled.”

Danny grinned, for the first time in what felt like forever, and Drew grinned back. 

Having a snowball fight against someone with years of experience was challenging. Danny knew how to pack snowballs efficiently and effectively. He also knew the lay of the land. But what he didn’t account for was Drew fighting like a dirty little stinker and doing things like climbing a nearby tree to shake the snow off the branches onto Danny’s head, or doubling back on his own steps and hiding in plain sight next to Danny’s Prius to ambush him. 

Drew quickly learned that the harder you compressed the snow, the better the snowball became, but also the more snow you needed. He imagined trying to do this without gloves and could already envisage a hand devoid of fingers lost to frostbite, just tiny little palms blistered and red.

Over the course of forty or so minutes, Drew became adept at dodging Danny’s painfully accurate snowball strikes, but he also fell on his ass five times and very nearly did the splits. He managed to score a few points against Danny when he wasn’t looking and at one point they both took cover behind objects and pelted snowballs whenever they saw the other bounce up to throw.

“So this feels futile,” Drew called out across the expanse of Danny’s yard. He couldn’t see Danny, but he knew he was far based on his shouting. “How will we know who’s won?”

“You haven’t been keeping score?”

“No. Was I supposed to?”

“It’s seven – four to me.”

“That can’t be right. I’ve gotten you like nine times, maybe eleven.”

Danny laughed. “Nope. You’ve glanced me on several occasions, rarely making a solid hit.”

“I don’t trust you.”

There was a crunch from behind and then Drew turned around to two snowballs hitting him square in the face, Danny’s gleeful expression just visible beyond the wet, frozen slush sliding over his eyes. Drew yelled, clutching his hand to his chest like he’d been mortally wounded.

“You shouldn’t,” Danny said, wiggling his eyebrows.

“How did you move so quickly and quietly?” 

“I didn’t. I threw my voice. When I was a kid I wasn’t only obsessed with magic. I had a ventriloquism phase too.”

“That is _dastardly_.”

Danny held his hand out to help Drew up, and Drew took it, then pulled Danny close for a bro-hug. He patted Danny’s shoulder, murmured about it being a good game. When they pulled apart, Danny was pink-faced and looked the happiest he had in days.

“Do you wanna build a snowman?” Danny sang.

“It doesn’t _have_ to be a snowman, right?” Drew asked, deliberately flat-voiced.

“Why? What were you thinking?”

“I don’t know. Like a snow-gnome?”

“Snowme?”

“Yeah!” 

They set about creating their snowme, using a twig as a structural support. It took two large balls of snow and then another lot that they shaped like a cone. Unfortunately, Drew soon discovered how quickly snow melted when being excessively molded. He’d been really proud of the snowme’s face until he stepped away and all definition was lost. 

“You gotta be delicate,” Danny said. “Imagine it’s like clay.”

Drew stood by the snowme, hands poised around the middle. “Okay, I’m ready for our _Ghost_ re-enactment.”

Danny giggled, came up behind Drew, wrapped his arms around him and placed his gloved hands over Drew’s. They patted the snowme lightly, Danny directing Drew’s hands, laughing all the while. It felt good, better than good, to have Danny pressed up against him, the vibration of his laughter reverberating throughout his body. Drew didn’t want the moment to end, but it had to eventually, as Danny moved away and held his fingers up to frame the shot. 

“Stay right there,” he said, removing a glove, pulling his phone out of his pocket and taking some pictures. 

Drew then took some of Danny and they posed for selfies together.

“This was everything I could’ve hoped for,” Drew said, honest in a way he rarely allowed himself. 

Danny clasped his hands together, rocked from side to side while batting his eyelashes. “Aww, shucks,” he said in a cutesy voice. 

“No, I really mean it,” Drew said, because it felt _important_.

Danny switched poses, looked away for a second, glanced back. 

“You’re welcome,” he said, with warmth in his voice. 

*

Drew spent all of the next day with his mom. He’d offered to help Danny shoot his music video, but Danny had been insistent that he could do it by himself, and besides, wasn’t part of this trip supposed to be about Drew and his mom enjoying the holiday season without familial expectations and pressure? 

Drew took her shopping for her Christmas gifts along Michigan Avenue. It was a tradition they’d had since he was young. He’d always been the kind of kid who would second-guess himself and his choices. He’d been one of those precociously intelligent children who was aware that most presents he’d think were cool would probably be the opposite for his mom. So he’d organized a day out where he’d buy his mom whatever she wanted within a prescribed budget. 

Many other family members condemned the practice as being without heart and boring, but he knew his mom loved it because she received exactly what she wanted but would still have something more personal than a gift card. There were plenty of other family members who could buy her random surprising crap she wouldn’t like, want or need. 

“What do you think of this jacket?” his mom asked, touching a deep green faux-fur-lined long-line coat with toggles.

“It’s very stylish, but it wouldn’t necessarily work back home,” Drew pointed out.

“About that,” his mom said, touching the jacket’s sleeve. “How would you feel about me moving here?”

Drew was caught off-guard. Before that day, his mom hadn’t expressed any interest in leaving Florida for any length of time. 

“It’d be okay, if you think it’s right for you,” Drew said, measuring his words carefully. “It’s not that far away, and I want you to be happy, so even if it was, I’d be resilient and deal with the difficulties.”

“I’d hoped that’s what you’d say. I’d feel the same, if you were to move here, for any reason.”

“What do you mean? Why do you think I want to move here?”

“Since we arrived you’ve seemed overall happier and more connected.”

“It’s Christmas. I’m always happier this time of the year.”

“Is that so?” his mom asked. Drew was so confused. She patted his cheek, shook her head. “Okay, darling. You know, I think I actually need a new pair of shoes.”

Drew squinted at her as she wandered off. He didn’t know why it felt like up was left and down was right, but it totally did.

*

The party was in full swing. The only flaw with having a group of improvisational comedians in a room all together was having a group of improvisational comedians in the room all together. No one was engaging in normal conversation, everyone felt the need to ‘yes, and’, and in any given moment Drew felt like the people he was talking to had either too much personality, or were a completely blank slate. 

He couldn’t stop thinking about the bet. It was hard to calm down and enjoy himself because he was scoping out potential participants. Danny had opened the night being kissed by a beautiful young woman named Katelyn, and then her husband Evan. Drew was contemplating explaining the situation to Micarah, who he’d been casually chatting with for twenty minutes, or waiting for someone a little less boisterous. 

“Is he making out with someone else?” Micarah exclaimed. “Danny’s way more extroverted than I remember him being.”

Drew turned to look where Micarah was focused. Danny was, indeed, making out with a shorter, blond-haired guy. 

“It’s for a bet,” Drew said, but noticed that Danny really seemed to be getting into it. “Or that’s how it started, anyway.”

He told Micarah about the bet, though he didn’t divulge his increasingly negative feelings about it. She seemed to pick up on them, but didn’t quite get the source right. Then again, neither had Drew.

“I can help!” she said, then went around the room whispering to some of her friends. 

Within ten minutes, Drew had not only evened up the kissing score with Micarah and her friends, but upped the ante by two kisses.

The kisses were fine. Nothing to write home about. Drew didn’t think he’d look like he enjoyed himself as much as Danny obviously had, but he had photographic proof he was doing better than Danny and that was all that counted.

Another half hour later, Danny had alternated kissing his friend Max and his husband, lights from the Christmas tree near him casting his face in blues, oranges, pinks, yellows and greens. Danny with kiss-plumped lips and touch-disheveled hair was a sight that had Drew’s tongue sticking to the roof of his dry mouth. 

He realized with startling clarity that he wanted to be the one to make Danny look that way. He wanted to be the one tilting Danny’s head gently and pressing a soft kiss against his lips. He wanted to make him blush and smile and go warm-voiced always and forever. 

“I’ve made a huge mistake,” Drew mumbled to himself, and then left the party to dwell in the guest room like the anti-social goblin he felt he truly was inside.

*

Drew had always known he was attracted to Danny. It hadn’t ever been a question in his mind. Danny was good-looking, smart, witty, talented – everything Drew admired in a person. Drew liked being the parallelogram to Danny’s square; how they were so alike in so many ways, but tilted in different directions. 

But he hadn’t fully understood the _scope_ of his attachment until this moment right here. He knew he loved being with Danny. He hadn’t caught onto the fact it was because being without him felt the wrongest of the wrong. But now, a lot of things that had been stirring him up over the past week were making sense. He’d gone into self-defense mode without consciously thinking about it. Shielding himself from a rejection that was never guaranteed. 

And now he had to live with the consequences.

*

The next few days passed in a blur. Drew thought he appeared mostly human. It might’ve been wishful thinking. 

On the first day of Drew’s fugue state, Danny had sat next to him and showed him all the pictures of his kisses. Drew thinks he’d been congratulatory. On the second day, Danny had spent the whole time editing his music video, which Drew had been forbidden from viewing. 

On the third day, Danny’s entire family plus Drew and his mom went Ice Skating at Millennium Park. Drew had temporarily woken up when Danny had nearly fallen over and he’d been able to stabilize him with a hand wrapped around his bicep while Danny flailed and eventually caught onto Drew’s waist. They’d stood staring at each other for several seconds, still caught in a half-hold, until Danny’s sister skated past them and coaxed them into a race.

Drew didn’t know what to do. Half of him wanted to confess everything to Danny, confident that they’d be able to remain friends, and the other half of him wanted to beat that half senseless. 

*

Snow was falling again, making the world outside look pure and bright. A group of Danny’s family and friends were at Danny’s house for family-friendly Christmas movies, and when the kids went to sleep, _Die Hard_. It was a little crowded and absolutely chaotic, but the cheeriness and general atmosphere of bonhomie was inviting. Danny had ordered a couple of deli platters to feed everyone and most groups of people had brought extra food, probably not counting on Danny’s ability to outsource. Or perhaps just being kind.

Tyler and Robbie were over the moon when they saw how their candy canes had grown. Having watched the dedication Danny had put into replacing the tic tacs with crushed up candy canes, then those with bigger pieces, then those with small candy canes, and finally these fuck-off giant versions from Costco, Drew felt even more tender-hearted toward him. 

Danny was the best kind of person. He turned a practical joke into the gift of altruism. He didn’t entertain merely to serve himself, but because he wanted to make others laugh, feel comforted, have a small but necessary reprieve from a hectic day. Danny had the capabilities to do anything he put his mind to. And he chose to make other people happy. 

“I heard about your bet,” Danny’s sister said, accosting Drew in the kitchen as he went to get a drink and a small break from the whirlwind of many bodies in an enclosed space. “I can kiss you, if you want?”

“No, thank you,” Drew said, elongating the vowels. He had his hands up and out like he was warding off phantoms. “Don’t get me wrong; you’re lovely. But I, uhm, I just don’t think it’d be a good choice. For either of us.”

“How about my friend Blair?”

“Why does this feel like a trap?” Drew asked, honestly.

“It's not. I'm just chaotic evil when it comes to my brothers.”

“And chaotic neutral the rest of the time?”

She smiled, Grinch-like. “Maybe. I'll talk to Blair.”

Before Drew could stop her, she swept from the room. Drew leaned over and pressed his forehead against the cool counter top. 

When Drew walked back into the living room, Blair was standing under a garland of mistletoe, gesturing with an easy smile. Blair was around the same height as Drew, slender, had blue eyes like Danny’s. He was still kind of gawky in the way Drew knew he himself had been several years prior. Drew looked at the younger man, his heart beating sluggish and painful in his chest. He was apprehensive. After recognizing how he'd gotten himself into this situation in the first place, he was reluctant continuing the charade. He could lose $500. It wouldn't be that bad. He could watch Danny win the bet. He could run all the way back to Florida and bury his head under the sand, ass up at the sun the way he felt he should be.

There was a crash, shouting, and then a flurry of commotion. A giant bowl of popcorn had fallen off the coffee table and scattered everywhere. 

“God, sorry,” Danny said. “I wasn't looking what I was doing.”

Tyler and Robbie immediately started scooping up handfuls and cramming them in their mouth. 

“Five second rule,” Robbie mumbled through corn kernels and laughter. 

Drew went over and helped, ushering Blair with his hand. The opportunity for another kiss to one-up the tally was lost and he was achingly thankful. 

*

Later that night, after _Die Hard_ and _Bad Santa_ Danny and Drew were drinking beers on the veranda. It was cold as balls, and his ass was numb from sitting on the cold concrete, but Drew was warmed from the inside just getting to be alone with Danny. Some stars were peeking out between clusters of clouds and there was ambient light from the cloud-covered moon flooding in and highlighting Danny’s profile. 

“I really like being with your family,” he offered, nodding back toward the inside. 

“Yeah, me too. They’re… pretty neat.”

“I can see that’s how you’ve managed to keep so grounded.”

“How do you mean?”

“You found success early on, you have a sizable following. You have talent and intelligence and… influence. A lot of people in your position lose their heads, but you haven’t. I think they help.”

“I guess,” Danny said, shrugging. “What helped you?”

“Paralyzing anxiety and mental health issues. And you know, I’m not like…” Drew gestured. “As successful and influential as you.”

“You say that like you have eleven followers and still work at Popeyes. Drew, don’t sell yourself short. I’ve been marginally luckier with the algorithm ‘cause I’m a fraction more predictable and consistent in posting.”

“Yeah. I know. That’s not what I mean.”

“Then what do you mean?” Danny asked, looking at Drew with no small amount of irritation.

“Oh, you’re gonna make me say it. All right. Okay. I’m not cute like you are. I don’t have big, expressive anime-like eyes, or dimples, or artfully arranged hair. When I smile I don’t make people swoon, I make them back slowly away. _You_ are the perfect boy next door and I’m the creep at the rear of the classroom who never puts up his hand.”

“You are so full of shit,” Danny said, laughing, but not really with humor. “First of all, you don’t have to fucking fish for compliments, I have no qualms about telling you how goddamn handsome you are. Second, we’re in our twenties, what the hell would you be doing at the rear of any classroom you yucky little wretch. Third, you go from saying I’m completely sexless to claiming I could wield power over people _because_ of my looks. Get your fucking mind games straight.”

“I haven’t been playing mind games.”

“Could’ve fooled me. One minute you’re acting like we’re friends, the next you’re actively humiliating me. Drew, what the fuck?”

“Humiliating?” Drew asked, but Danny had gotten up and was walking back into his house. “Danny?!”

Danny didn’t turn around, pushing inside and closing the door with a slam.

And this was when Drew realized he’d totally fucked up. He felt like gum that had been over chewed and spat out. Like a half-baked cookie that was falling apart. Like the worst kind of asshole; swollen and sore.

He knew he had to do something. 

*

At a loss for what else to do, Drew went inside and found Tim. Danny had apparently gone to bed, but implored everyone to stay as long as they wanted. Which, of course, had set several people to start packing, as they were only still there by grace of peer pressure and obligation. 

Tim was Danny’s best friend. He understood him in a way no one else did. And he’d always been kind to Drew, like he wasn’t afraid to share the close friend title. If anyone could or would help him, he figured Tim was the best choice. 

He explained what he was hoping for in lowered tones, saying a lot without actually voicing anything. Tim listened, nodded along. Seemed to pick up on all the unspoken components of Drew’s requests.

“I tried to tell you,” Tim said, because he was kind but not angelic. 

“I know,” Drew sighed. 

“Play with fire and you get burned.”

“Yes, that is immediately apparent.”

“You’re both the stupidest people I know.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

“But as long as you promise to make up for what you’ve done, I’ll help you,” Tim concluded. 

*

The stage was set. Tim had successfully lured Danny and his entire cadre of family and friends away for the day. He’d also just texted Drew that Danny was on his way back home, while everyone else was staying at Danny’s parents’ house. Perfect. 

It had taken three hours of searching for the plant and another two hours of hard work to get the ceiling festooned with bundles of mistletoe. He’d added lines of what the store had termed ‘Italian lights’ but he knew as fairy lights.

He had music playing softly in the background; Billie Holiday and Ella Fitzgerald, Christmas classics and soft jazz. 

He was about to shit his pants, but he could bear the sacrifice. He didn't like them much anyway.

It was chilling, putting your heart on the line, being truly honest when it would be so much easier to lie and deflect. It wasn’t something he’d often allowed himself. He’d had his life’s great successes by putting himself out there and taking risks, but he’d conveniently forgotten that every time another situation like this presented itself.

But he owed it to Danny to apologize. And he owed it to himself to repair their friendship. 

The door clicked open before Drew could properly mentally prepare himself. Of course, he hadn’t heard the Prius drive up, because Prius, duh. 

Danny walked in, frowning, stood in the center of the room like an NPC. 

“What’s going on?”

“I’ve commandeered your living room.”

“I can see that.”

“It’s to apologize.”

“Okay,” Danny said, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms. 

“I didn’t know that you’d taken me seriously, when I said you weren’t sexy. I thought it was such a laughable suggestion you were laughing too.”

“I tried to laugh along, but honestly? It stung,” Danny said, sounding hollow. 

Drew could clearly see the darker circles under Danny's eyes, the deepening of fine lines on his forehead, around his mouth. He couldn't believe he hadn't noticed before. He'd been so wrapped up inside his own reactions, he hadn't paid attention to Danny's.

“I’m sorry. It makes me feel like the worst kind of person, that I caused you pain.”

“You kinda made me feel like you think I'm an ugly little weasel man. Actually, no kinda about it.”

“I realized that yesterday. I thought it was a joke you were in on. I didn’t think you could ever believe that I’d see you that way.”

“Well, I do. Or I did,” Danny said, still frowning, gazing up at the mistletoe as it hung with only two inches of free space between it. “I take it this is part of the apology.”

“Well, yeah. I was hoping I could kiss you,” Drew said, so hopeful he thought his heart was going to burst.

Danny rocked back on his heels. “That means I’ll have one more kiss than you.”

“I know.”

“The bet ends tonight. Automatic forfeit.”

“Yup.”

“You could just give me the $500.”

“I could.”

Danny stepped closer, seemed to brace himself for impact. “You can kiss me.”

Drew breathed in and out slowly three times, tried to remind himself the world would still spin on its axis, the sun would still shine, and happiness would still be attainable even if this wasn’t how he’d built it up inside his head. He cupped his hand against Danny’s jaw, thumb resting near the corner of his lips. Danny held onto his waist, hands hot like brands through his shirt. He ducked in and pressed a gentle but firm kiss against Danny’s soft lips, his eyes fluttering closed as Danny moved against him with tender touches. He wanted this kiss to tell Danny that he never wanted to hurt him again, that he hated himself for being so foolish. But it was just a kiss, so it didn’t say much except ‘this feels good’. 

Drew deepened the kiss before he could stop himself, but Danny didn’t seem to mind, reciprocating by tonguing at the seam of Drew’s lips, seeking entry. Danny kissed with single-minded focus, adapting to Drew’s movements with lingering warm and wet pushes that made Drew lose all sense of time and place. He wanted to give, and give, and give. Drew knew he made a sound, a half-sigh, half-whimper, but it didn’t matter when Danny slid his hand up his back and scratched into the fine hairs at the nape of his neck, or tilted in such a way that they were pressed even closer together.

They pulled apart after what felt like hours but was more realistically a couple of minutes, Drew breathing so hard his chest was sore. 

“I really am so sorry. I fell down so hard trying not to tell you how I feel, I crashed through the earth’s crust to the molten core beneath. I was unthinkingly cruel. But I _never_ wanted to hurt you.”

“How do you feel?”

“I’ve been half in love with you since I met you and wholly in love with you since I don’t know when.”

Danny pulled further away, shook his head. “That’s not funny, Drew.”

“I’m not joking. I understand, believe me, that you don’t feel the same way. But I figured you should know. You don’t have to forgive me, I get the anger. But please don’t give _up_ on me. I can be a better friend. That’s all I want.”

“I need a moment to think.”

Danny turned around and Drew felt his heart plummet from his chest to his feet, collecting bones, muscles, and a myriad of other organs on the way. Danny walked three paces away, then spun on his heel, running back to Drew and crashing into him with an embrace that almost sent them both rocketing to the floor.

“Okay, I’ve thought about it. Of course I’m not gonna give up on you, you fuckin’ galoot. You hurt my feelings, but you better believe I’m gonna expect you to help me mend them.”

There was air trapped in Drew’s lungs but it didn’t hurt.

“Also, I love you too. Just a bit. Just a teensy weensy tiny amount. Every second of every day,” Danny said, his eyes alight with mischief. 

He kissed Drew, then, syrupy slow, until Drew didn’t know horizontal from vertical, diagonal from parallel, and he didn’t care at all. 

*

Drew was watching Danny’s video for the fifth time, smiling so hard his cheeks hurt.

“I’m a ho ho ho for Christmas, from the wrapping to the tree. I’ve been seeing if you’re nice, bitch, or a little naughty. Better hope that you’ve been good ‘cause you know I’ve got a sleigh. Your present’s been requested on his magic holiday. I’m the elf on the shelf and I watch you all the time, when you’re mean, when you’re Grinchy, then you know I’m feeling pine. I’ve got high-ass elf-esteem from my hat down to my toes. If you’re bad, bitch, then I’ll deck your halls ‘til you’ve got Rudolph’s nose.”

Danny was wearing the most ridiculous costume. He had on a green, white and black crop top with the ends shredded, a jingle bell attached to every strip of fabric, dark green booty shorts over light green tights, and knee length boots. A hat was perched precariously on his curls, obviously kept there by clever pinning. 

It was uncomfortably sexually arousing.

It shouldn’t have worked, but it did, in ways that made Drew ashamed. 

“Are you watching that again?” Danny asked, collapsing next to Drew on the bed, rolling his eyes. His hair was damp from the shower and he smelled good; clean and wholesome. 

“It’s just really clever,” Drew defended half-heartedly.

“Sure. That’s the only reason. You could stream it on Spotify.”

“No, thanks. I prefer this version.”

Danny grinned, leaned in and pressed a kiss to the hinge of Drew’s jaw. “I just realized we never took a photo.”

“What?”

“Of our kiss, last night. It doesn't count. Guess we owe each other 500 big boys.”

“We could pay each other back in kisses.”

“What, like a dollar a kiss?”

“I think they're worth a lot more than that, but since you set the cost, I'm not gonna argue. After all, a thousand kisses will take a while, and I have no complaints.”

Danny smiled at him again, soft and sweet. Drew traced his lips with his thumb. 

Drew didn’t know how he’d ended up here, but it felt like some kind of Christmas miracle. When they went to Danny’s parents’ house for lunch and the opening of presents, no one seemed overly surprised that they were clinging to each other like two ends of a ribbon wrapped up in a bow. They shared a glass of eggnog, and gave each other the vegetables they knew the other liked, and held hands and swayed to the music when the meal and present unwrapping was done. 

Drew liked Christmas. It was bright, joyous, full of childish wonder and excitement. And he loved spending Christmas with Danny even more.


End file.
